On June 10, 2023, many children were brought to a “Family Friendly Drag Show” in the City of Grand Haven. Proponents of this event argued it teaches children to be inclusive and to love everyone. However, drag shows are adult themed and sexual in nature. While adults have the right to participate in drag shows we must acknowledge that drag shows are, at best, confusing to children.
Adults bringing children to sexual events under the guise of inclusivity is considered by many to be deviant grooming and a form of child abuse. Anyone who has raised or taken care of children knows that children lack discernment. On the down side, children throw temper tantrums, they hit their siblings, they lie to get their way, and they say what they are thinking and sometimes it is mean. They also express excitement, they laugh a lot, they are open to multitudes of activities, they willingly do things for others, they hold hands and hug their friends, and sometimes they hug strangers. Kids learn acceptable behavior by watching those around them and adjusting what they do.
Most parents do not bring their children to Ultimate Fighting Events (UFC) events. Conversely, most parents teach their children not to hit people and understand that watching grown men beating the snot out of each other would be a confusing counter message. In the case of drag shows, unfortunately, some people have prioritized recognizing the right of people to live and portray a gender-bending lifestyle over their obligations to protect children from adult themes.
Perhaps surprising to some, a large portion of the gay population disagrees with adults bringing children to drag shows. They have even organized against the sexualization of children and have created an organization known as Gays Against Groomers. Here’s a video explaining how adults who bring children to drag shows are not only virtue signaling, but seeking approval for themselves from the gay community, while drag queens who perform for children are seeking approval for themselves from children. In other words, drag performances are not for children. This is evidenced by their body language and the looks on their faces.
Photos from the Grand Haven Pride Festival reveal a similar level of discomfort and confusion among the children.
(photo credit: Bob Walma posted publicly to FB on 6/10/23)
Notice how this child is trying to be polite and respectful by keeping his hand behind his back while offering money to the drag queen, but he is reluctant to get close to the drag queen.
(photo credit June.dildine posted Instagram on 6/15/23)
These children show similar reluctance, yet they are clearly being encouraged by an adult.
(photo credit Jeanne Sherman posted publically on Instagram 6/18/2023)
Even the adult in this photo appears uncomfortable, but appears to be seeking the approval of the performer.
(photo credit Jamesverburg13 on Instagram on 6/10/23 -part of video)
This photo left me speechless.
Ottawa County Commissioners highlighted this lack of discernment at the Health and Human Services meeting on June 20, 2023.
Commissioner Miedema stated, “I would like to share, as a teacher with a master’s degree in early childhood. I know that one of the main ways that young children learn is by observing the world around them and then acting out what they are observing; in a way making sense of the world around them. This is called pretend play. So, let’s imagine that a young boy or girl experienced a drag show, who were given money to offer to the drag queens during the performance, and now let’s fast forward to this fall. Imagine with me, a preschool classroom, and now this young boy or girl offers pretend money to another classmate suggesting they perform such as the drag queen was doing. Is this promoting healthy behavior?”
Commissioner Rhodea also commented on this topic. “They [children] are learning sexualized behaviors. When they are exposed to these things, it reduces their inhibitions. I know a lot of people don’t like hearing the word grooming, but this truly is grooming. Having worked with sexually abused children, the kinds of behaviors that children exhibit after they are exposed to sexualized behaviors often raise red flags with schools and with parents and lead to calls with places like the Children’s Advocacy Center. [] There is quite a lack of discernment going on here.”
It is difficult to believe that the sexualization of children is taking place in our community and people are being desensitized to it. In an adult setting, we can dismiss these events and “let them be,” but when children are involved, it is increasingly more important to understand the difference between inclusion versus behaviors that break down boundaries and lead to abuse. What do we want for our community?