Part 2: Ottawa County Suicide Prevention Training
... and Sexual Predators Groom Victims Using these Techniques
We recently detailed a training session prepared for Ottawa County by the MDE LGBTQ Student Project with the goal of reducing teen suicide. Although the intentions were noble, the training contained suggestions that are questionable, misguided, and in some cases dangerous.
What’s startling is that child sexual predators groom victims using many of the same techniques described in the Michigan Department of Education presentation. Sexual predator grooming includes isolation, building trust, sharing sexually explicit material and keeping secrets, and the Michigan Department of Education is suggesting these same techniques will reduce suicide in LGBTQ youth.
Here is a reference from the Maryland Coalition Against Sexual Assault which describes the Behaviors of Sexual Predators: Grooming:
All teenagers go through some degree of uncertainty; a struggle to understand their identity and their value. In addition, teens naturally rebel from their parents. It’s part of growing up and becoming independent adults. Schools encouraging rebellion and creating isolation of children from their parents is not helpful. We had ‘goth’ kids when I was young, this generation has LGBTQ. Those kids are screaming for attention and the numbers of children in this category is rising rapidly nationwide.
According to WebMD and the CDC, the percentage of teens identifying as LGBTQ rose from 8.3% to 11.7% from 2015 to 2019. The rise in teen suicide correlates directly with the rise in the number of children who identify as LGBTQ.
If we know there is a correlation between teen suicide and LGBTQ students, and we also know that the percentage of LGBTQ students is significantly higher than it has been at any time throughout our history, then we can conclude that the current approach is not working. The training is misguided. The real solution to improving the mental health of our youth and reducing teen suicide is to change the entire approach.
While some kids are legitimately LGBTQ, the data implies that something else is driving children to identify as LGBTQ. The question we should be asking is: Why are there so many children who identify as LGBTQ?
The nationwide methodology of teaching kindness and caring has gone from accepting people who are different to shaming those who don’t actively fight for change. When a child is called an oppressor for simply being a straight, or white, or male, or Christian, that child begins to reject himself. With a simple statement he can say, “I am bisexual.” And now he is no longer an oppressor “bad guy”, but a victim “good guy.” Now he can live free from shame. Perhaps this is the reason the rates of both LGBTQ students and teen suicide are rising?
As a society we need to quit victim mentality teaching. We need to quit hyper focusing on race and LGBTQ. We need to quit driving children towards activism. We need to teach ALL people the golden rule. Bullies must be held accountable and children need to learn how to stand up for themselves.
The key to reducing suicide is building a community around struggling youth, not isolating them. At risk children need multiple people they can rely on. Kids need to learn confidence and resilience. Kids need to stop being told that it is their job to fight oppression. If we can remove these heavy burdens from children, and reintroduce fun into their lives, then suicide rates will drop. We need to get kids outside, get them exercising, and give them something to look forward to. Not only are these things good for physical health, when children are involved in activity, community naturally builds around them.
When it comes to specific policies and teacher training, we need to talk about the risk of sexual abuse and the predatory behavior of deviant adults. How do we identify this behavior and how do we implement safeguards to protect children? “Two adults at all times” like the boy scouts is a logical place to start. We can instinctively come to the conclusion that we can’t allow adults to be presenting or giving pornographic material to children. Teachers should not be having discussions with kids about gender and sexuality. That’s what child predators do.
Child predators exist. We need to acknowledge that reality. We must demand healthy boundaries and safeguards be put in place to protect children. We need to have a plan for detecting and removing risk. Teachers who want to help kids should learn what the indicators of sexual abuse are and what they can do to:
Make sure that the classroom is a safe environment
Promote safe practices with colleagues
Report Concerns
Get kids help
Communicate with parents
Build a healthy community around vulnerable kids
-With their peers
-With other adults who respect safe boundaries
Encourage development of and understanding of value and resilience
If we approach child mental health and teen suicide reduction in this way, the results will speak for themselves.